“Too Old To Die Young!” From The Zine Series “STAMINA”

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Too Old To Die Young!

From The Zine Series STAMINA #3

Too Late To Die Young

Now that I’m in my mid 40’s and at the so called ‘mid life crisis’ age we have all heard about, I have to admit I do get some attention when going to a skateboard park, or while attending a punk rock show and even when catching some waves at the local’s only California coastline. It’s to be expected and most people do appreciate my efforts and my experience.

Monday Santa Cruz

So I realize I have to accept the fact that I will be dealing with some worried mothers at the skateboard parks and usually I end up having a little chat with them to show I’m no petifile, but rather just a big dumb kid still holding on to his youth. Hey that’s fine with me, I’m just happy to be there and able to drop in and grind that place to pieces, carve out a few lines and I’m out.

Monday Boneless

Now when I get dressed up for a gig in my punk rock attire complete with a denim vest jacket that’s full of patches I’ve made from cutting up old t-shirts and sewing them on, I tend to get a little amped up on catching a banging hardcore show. Although, I do need to be aware of the age difference between myself and the kids of today, the ones I’ll probably be bashing heads with if I decide to do some moshing that night.

Oh How

In most cases at the skate parks and the punk shows, or even at the surf spots, I do gain some respect for my age and believe me I think I deserve it. I’ve been living this lifestyle for 30+ years now and don’t let the grey hair fool you; show this pioneer some due respect. That’s all I expect, I don’t want to cause any trouble, or spoil anybody’s ‘good vibrations,’ no way, not at all.

Monday Surfing

Now I will throw down under certain circumstances, or if someone steps to my grill trying to front with some, “Hey OG” bullshit or tries to use my obvious experienced appearance as a prop for his nickel and dime senior citizen jokes, saying, “Hey gramps the kiddy bowl is at the front of the park, or the kiddy waves are down by the pier,” or “Hey Old School, the kiddy seats are up in the balcony.” Oh Fuck No! Kiddy just knocked you out son!”


Okay, so I don’t think I’m wrong here for demanding at least some props for keeping my game real for so many years. I kept my bag of tricks fresh with a steady flow and when I was coming up I showed nothing but respect to the senior ranks. Seriously, I’ve been riding this magic carpet for decade after decade now, so please show some due respect to the forefathers who paved the way for our rights and for our freedoms we all luckily enjoy today.

All Day Long
Okay, so my mind may be a little tired from all the years of living the ‘endless summer,’ but don’t let the slow memory fool you. I dogged your daddy’s back when they were coming up and I sure as hell ain’t getting fazed by your swag, hipster, dubsteping, steezy attitude. No way, pal, “I’M HERE TO STAY” and if it’s not meant for me to blow things up anymore on the level, then everybody will at least know that I died trying.Up The Punx!’

-Rich Monday

The Opening Chapter To The Zine “STAMINA 3″

Stamina Sample Cover

Google Doesn’t Recognize Itself Anymore, Marks Own Email As Spam

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D.I.Y. Publishing:

Google’s Top Secret Algorithms even bounce their own email marked for SPAM!

Originally posted on Consumerist:

Google's looking at the man in the mirror. Google’s looking at the man in the mirror. Though it’s usually the place where fake Rolex offers, male enhancement drugs and princes from Ghana go to die, it’s always a good idea to check your spam folder. Because even Google will keep its own emails out of your Gmail inbox.

Whether it’s because Google hasn’t taken a long, hard look at itself in the mirror lately to really get down to the nitty gritty of what makes it Google, or because its own spam filters have a thing against the company for some reason, Consumerist reader C.D. says an email from Google Play ended up in his Gmail spam.

“I got an email in my Gmail spam folder — from Google! Very funny to me!” he writes.

Perhaps it’s time for some self affirmations, Google: “I’m good enough, and I’m smart enough… not to call myself spam.”

View original

The Six Best Viral Videos Of 2014 (+ Jayn And Katie Mason’s Picks!)

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D.I.Y. Publishing:

Check Out The Keys To VIRAL Success On The Internet

Originally posted on Alice@97.3:

Everyone loves recapping the year in silly listicles…and I guess we’re the same way!

We surveyed and looked over some of the year’s best viral videos to figure out which ones were our big favorites.

Check out some of the best ones, along with a couple picks by Katie Mason and Jayn!

Hero cat in California saves family boy from dog attack:

Woman claims to have three breasts:

Ballerina Misty Copeland’s Under Armour Ad:

Strangers meet for the first time and kiss:

And from the DJs:


This was one of my favorites of the year because I got crazy-into the World Cup this year… I’d been kinda interested last time, but this time I was ALL about it…and I love everything about this spot (except for the fact that there aren’t any girls playing!)

Katie Mason:

My pick is the NYC street harassment video. It opened a *lot* of…

View original 67 more words

Making A Mock Zine Using MS-Word

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Yes You Can Make A Zine Using MS-Word

You can use MS-Word for making a zine, or just for formatting a mock print to help you move closer to the all important final print. It’s a challenge using MS-Word compared to using a desktop publisher such as Quark’s Xpress, Adobe’s InDesign, or Serif’s Pagemaker, but it can be done and it is an alternative to the cut and paste method. Most self publishing authors of books will format their manuscript using MS-Word, or a similar word processor to produce a mock book before going to a POD (print on demand) service, or other publisher like Lulu.com, or Amazon’s CreatingSpaces.

First off all measurements used below will be in the format of “inches” to make things easier.

Making your mock book will require 3 basic steps:

1. Formatting your manuscript
2. Estimating your page count
3. Creating a page plan.

You’ll need the following:

* Your manuscript in MS-Word
* Several sheets of blank paper
* Pen or pencil
* Scissors
* Sharpie

Remember: We are not making the actual manuscript layout yet, just the formatting to get an accurate page count and to figure out where things may need to be edited in the layout. Also, this page plan is for the interior of your book only. The cover is always done separately as a different file and on different paper stock.

Formatting your manuscript:

Now that you’ve determined exactly what you’re putting into your zine or book, put all of your text into one MS-Word document and save it before continuing. Now we can begin to style it by putting in the fonts and point sizes you have decided on. Now is also the time to think about paragraph spacing whether you use single-spacing, or a little more like double spacing between lines, etc…

Next, set the margins in your document so that they mimic the page size you will be working with. In MS-Word, you can manipulate the margins from the “Format” menu, under the “Document” option.

For a half-letter scale, or aka “digest” sized zine, the page size in the finished zine would be 5.5 x 8.5 using a standard landscape letter-sized sheet of paper, folded in half. Half-inch margins all the way around would leave you with a 4.5 x 7.5 area for your content to print. In the finished book, your gutter (the blank area in the center of the book where the inner margins meet), should be 1 inch.

That means for a letter-sized MS-Word document, you should set your margins to:

Top: 1.75 inches
Bottom: 1.75 inches
Left: 2 inches
Right: 2 inches

For a half-legal sized zine, the page size in the finished booklet would be 7 x 8.5 on a landscape legal-sized sheet, folded in half. In this larger format, you’ll have a bit more leeway with margins if you want to go larger. This is where you want to tweak your manuscript to the sizes you like. In this example I will use  a 0.5 margin all the way around to make things simple. That will result in a 6 x 7.5 inch area for your content, with a 1-inch gutter in the finished zine.

Using a legal-sized MS-Word document, 8.5 x 11, you should set your margins to:

Top: 3.25 inches
Bottom: 3.25 inches
Left: 1.25
Right: 1.25

This is where to estimate your page count:

Once your text is styled and you have your document margins set to model your chosen page size, you should be able to easily estimate about how many pages your content will be. Print your a sample document and if your margins, text and paragraph styling are not how you like them, play with the adjustments a little more until you like what you print.

Your printed formatted manuscript should now closely resemble the page count of how your finished book will print . Keep in mind that your manuscript is a stack of single sided sheets of paper and your finished book will have four book pages per double-sided sheet, so your stack in this mock run will be thicker than your finished book will be.

You’ll probably want to add some or all of the following:

Front matter - The term for anything that comes before the first page of your manuscript
* Title page
* Contact info/copyright page
* Table of contents
* Acknowledgments – These can go up front, in the back, or be combined with the copyright notice

Back matter - The term for anything that comes after your last page of your manuscript
* Author bio/contributor notes
* Blank pages
* Glossary

If your Table of Contents, contributor notes, credits, or acknowledgments look like they will run more than one page, the safest bet would be to format them just as you did for the rest of your manuscript, to see how long they actually are when styled the way you want them in the final print. Otherwise just estimate one page for each, that is what is ideal.


A simple way to do this would be to, collect printed copies of the images you plan on using and place them on the paper sheet with the same margins as the rest of your document, then add the necessary pages to your estimated calculation. If you have the images already digitized, you can go ahead and use the “Insert/Picture” function of MS-Word and put them in the manuscript right away. You might want to round your page up to make sure you have extra room to play with sizing later.

Note: the # of formatted manuscript pages + the # of front matter pages + the # of back matter pages =  the total page count of your finished book, or zine.

Some of you may feel comfortable skipping the steps above and just “eyeball” your page count numbers estimate after you’ve completed your first few projects. I personally wouldn’t skip this step, but some do, it’s just up to the self publisher.

Creating a page plan, for your mock book:

Folded booklets like the ones we’re making have page counts that are in multiples of 4, because each sheet of paper will contain four book pages on it:

Two on side A. Two on side B. So round your estimated page count up to the nearest multiple of 4.

Example: 18 pages would need to be 20, 21 becomes 24 and so on…

Now, take your page count and divide it by 4.

This simple formula will give you the total number of sheets of paper per zine (see below).

20 book pages = 5 sheets of paper
36 book pages = 9 sheets of paper
and so on…

Here I have been using a 12-page zine as the example, but the idea is the same for any number of sheets used.

12 book pages divided by 4 = 3 sheets of paper

So, I’m going to take 3 sheets, and label each side: A – B would be the front & back of the first paper sheet, C – D would be the front & back of the second paper sheet, E – F the front & back of the third paper sheet.

Then I’m going to stack sheets A & B, C & D, E & F, with the A, C, E sides facing up and A on top of C on top of E.

Fold them in half, like a booklet, with A on the outside, where the spine will be.

Now, starting from the first page of your mock booklet and with your formatted manuscript as your guide, label each page with the title of the printed piece that should appear there. Title page, copyright page, table of contents, blank, book matter (manuscript) through to the final page.

Holding your mock booklet at the spine, flip through it a several times, read it examine the arrangement of your front and back matter and check it against your formatted manuscript again to make sure you’ve allowed enough space for pieces of matter that run more than one booklet page. Make sure you’ve allowed space for all the elements you want to see in the interior of your finished publication.

When you’re sure your mock book accurately reflects the length and arrangement of your finished book, you’re ready to use this page plan to create your layout!

Layout Part 1, Setting up your layout document

Once you’ve got your manuscript formatted and your mock zine made, you’re ready to start working on your zine layout.

Since you are using MS-Word, this example will be geared towards that software only. I’m going to be talking about a digest sized booklet (8.5 x 11) with a landscape orientation, but the steps are the same for legal-sized paper as well.

Important: You must be sure your mock book “reads” properly and that you’ve allotted space for everything. Your page-count must be a multiple of 4 (because each sheet of paper will contain 2 booklet pages on the front, and 2 on the back).

To set up your layout, all you’ll need is your computer with MS-Word loaded.

Set up your document:

1. Open a new document in MS-Word.

2. Under the “File” menu, select “Page Setup.”

3. In the “Page Setup” window, select your paper size (letter or legal) and the orientation will be landscape.

4. Click “OK.” Your MS-Word document should now reflect your chosen paper size and orientation. Choose “Save” and it is now ready to format.

5. Under the “Format” menu, select “Document.”

6. Set your top, bottom, and left & right margins to your liking from earlier. You must use the same margins you selected for your zine page size in the mock book steps portion above. The examples were for 0.5 (half-inch) margins, so you enter .5 for all margins. If you estimated a wider margin, you should adjust them now. Click “OK”. The click “Save.”

7. Next, you’ll set up your columns. Choose two columns per page for this example, which is adequate for most books. You can use 4 columns per sheet of paper (for 2 columns per booklet page), but the concept remains  the same. Under the “Format” menu, select “Columns.” Click the graphic showing “2 columns,” or type 2 into the box and hit enter. I estimated a 1″ gutter (space between columns where your binding will go) in the mock book step above, so enter 1.0 in that “column box.” The column widths will automatically adjust. Click “OK.” Then click  “Save.”

8. Your layout document is all set up now. You are ready to start pasting in your text. If you plan to do other zines in the future with this same format style, choose “Save As” to save the layout and name something like “Next_Zine_Template.doc,” or something you will easily remember. Each time you want to start a book, open your template and do a “Save As” under the name of the next project. You’ll be ready to paste and print immediately next time you publish a zine.

Layout Part 2: Placing your text

Now that you have formatted your manuscript, made your mock book and set up your document layout, you’re ready to place your text in place.

To complete your layout, you’ll need:

* Your formatted manuscript open on your computer desktop
* Your layout document from the layout, Part 1 open on your computer desktop
* Your mock book at hand
* A printer that works
* Tape, paper clips, a stapler if you choose to staple.

Using your mock book as a page plan:

Take your mock book apart and arrange the sheets on the table in front of you. Your mock book spreads are your page plan. Spread A of your Mock Book shows you what needs to be on Spread A of your Layout document. Spread B of your mock book tells you what to put on Layout Spread B, and so on.

Using your disassembled mock book as your guide, you’ll know exactly where to place each piece of text into the layout document, copying and pasting it from your formatted manuscript.

Copying & pasting your text:

Note: In your formatted manuscript, each page = one booklet page. So each layout of your page spread will contain 2 manuscript pages, 1 in each column. These pages do not appear in the manuscript in the order you will be pasting them. You will see here what I mean.

1. Look at Spread A and the notes you’ve put on each side.

2. In your formatted manuscript, find and highlight the text you want to place in the left column. Under the “Edit” menu, select “Copy.”

3. In your layout document, place your cursor at the top of the left column. Under the “Edit” menu, select “Paste.”

4. In your layout document, click “Return” until your cursor appears at the top of the right hand column.

5. Go back to your formatted manuscript and “copy” the text you want to place on the right side of this spread, as before.

6. Go back to the layout document, and “paste” the text in, as before. Compare with mock book spread “A” to layout spread “A.” The content you’ve pasted should match your mock book notes.

7. In your layout document, under the “Insert” menu, choose “Page Break.” This will add another page to your layout, and you’re ready to paste in your text for page spread “B.”

8. Repeat the steps above as necessary until you’ve created a layout spread for each lettered mock book page spread. For your blank pages, use “Insert/Break/Page.” Click “Save” after each paste and compare your page layout spreads to your mock book page spreads to make sure they are still matching up, check often.

9. Print your page layout spreads. If you like them, label them with their spread letters to help you compare to your mock zine one last time.

10. If your layout spreads match your mock book spreads, you’re golden. Save your layout. Close your manuscript document, you’re through using it.

OPTIONAL: If you would  like, you can make sure you’ve got everything where it should be by making a new mock book with your printed layout spreads: tape, paper clip, or staple it to resemble a finished zine. Use “Layout Spread A” to “Layout Spread B,” facing back to back, to imitate a double-sided printed sheet in your zine. Do the same for C – D, E – F, etc. Then you can stack them in order “A, C, E,” facing up with “A” on top and fold the stack along the gutter. See below.

11. Holding your new printed mock zine at the spine, read it for an order check and for flow. Are pieces that are running more than one page appear in the right order? Does the layout contain the correct element you want in your finished zine? Are you happy with the spacing, fonts and layout? If so, then you are ready for printing, or photocopying.

Printing and/or Photocopying

As you’ve probably realized, once you’ve got your layout done, the rest is relatively easy. You’ll have finished zines in ready for print in no time.

Now we will discuss your two basic reproduction options: printing off the originals, or photocopying from a single original.

You will need:

* Your formatted layout document on your computer
* Your printer online
* Plain paper to test and to make your original for photocopying
* And a photocopier, unless you are printing each copy
* Your interior paper stock ready

Converting your layout to a PDF is optional:

This step is optional, but I recommend it because making your layout a PDF locks your formatting, page setup, and fonts into place, and that means you can print your books from any computer with the same perfect results. Printing from a PDF also provides insurance against accidental nudging and re-flow. Most newer versions of MS-Word have PDF capability built-in to the Print menu. Once you make a PDF you cannot edit your text, so make sure things are exactly as you want them.

Open your layout document on your computer. Under File, select Print. From the Print menu, click the “Save As PDF” choice.

Note: If you have blank spreads in your zine  layout, you should choose “Create Blank Spreads” from the “Options menu” to process these pages into your design.

-The Zineiac

Build A Survival Community To Aid With Possible Disaster And Tragedy

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Organize Your Survival Community (SC)
And Complete Your Emergency Preparation

From the STAMINA Zine Series #3

survival kit homemade

Build your Survival Community (SC) with the people whom you trust and rely on should an emergency situation arise and you become in need of any kind of help. Emergency responders like police, fire rescue, and EMT’s are stretched out thin. Grocery stores and gas stations may not even be open.

This is where your Survival Community (SC) comes in. Once the emergency has passed and after everyone is out of imminent danger, your SC can also help provide supplies others will do without. When store shelves are bare or empty, you can still barter for necessary items with each other.

Burning Money

Trick Or Trap

Each member of your SC should ideally have a different set of skills or trade. A group that contains a doctor, mechanic, carpenter and hunters, are going to be more valuable than elderly, ill, or even just lazy friends and relatives who may offer no help whatsoever.

You should keep your SC always close by and within walking distance. Transportation routes, road and traffic conditions will become unreliable after any tragic disaster.


Keep the group small, no more than two to three pairs or a six member family. Any larger, the group becomes more difficult to manage, organize and trust.

Unlike in a wilderness setting, you may need to keep up with appearances in an urban survival situation. It’s a good idea to put up window blackening material like aluminum foil, or blackout curtains found at hardware stores. If everyone around you is ill prepared, you don’t want to draw attention to yourself. Desperation brings out the worse in people, even people who you once called friends.


Always travel lightly. If you must evacuate, use a ‘bug out bag’ or a ‘72 hour survival kit’ to cover your basic necessities in short term situations. Don’t bring along unnecessary bulky, heavy items. You may have to get out and walk while carrying all your possessions.

“The First Rule Of Your Survival Community Is
You Do Not Talk About The Survival Community.”



Generators become very valuable after the power is out for a few days. If you must run one, secure it with a heavy chain and lock.

Arm yourself. People do crazy things in emergencies. Always carry at minimum, a knife and pepper spray when away from SC home base.

Stay away from crowds and FEMA camps. This is not the time to rely on the kindness of strangers. Find a hotel or secluded campsite to set up your SC home base.

archist cookbook


Food, Clothing and Shelter
Food Preparation and Preservation
Water Purification and Storage
Cleaning Products
Communications – Radio and Cell Phone
Hunting and Fishing Equipment
Bartering Items
Electrical Generation Source
Lighting – Flashlights and Batteries
Books, Games and Toys
Heating and Cooling Equipment
Laundry – Wash and Dry Area
Fuel For All Purposes
Human Waste Disposal – Paper Supplies and Area
Medical, Dental and General Hygiene Items
Tools For All Purpose
Weapons Owned or made Available

Survive                      Survival Maps


Stay close to home SC. In emergency situations your home base becomes your castle and your sanctuary. Make the best out of a bad situation. Always be aware of your possessions, supplies and your surroundings.

Attitude is key and without it, no one individual will survive the circumstances that may arise. In the end the individuals with the best attitude, planning and bartering items, will survive. Collect items for trade and bartering as you travel. Always keep your eyes on the future, be prepared for anything and stay the course.

Kimber 45

Survival Duct Tape


Gold or Silver (coins, jewelry)
Alcohol (beer, hard liquor)
Tobacco (cigarettes, chew)
Guns and Ammunition
Fuel (cooking, heating, automobile)
Sweets (chocolate, hard candy)
Clothing (seasonal, boots, hats, gloves)
Automotive Parts
Coffee, Tea and Soda
Tools, Parts and Scissors
Soap, Shampoo, Hand Lotion, Sanitizers and Toilet Paper
Cooking Supplies, Plastic Bags
Food (fresh, canned, cooked)
Notebooks, Tape, Maps, Pens and Pencils
Flashlights, Lighters and Matches

Photos courtesy of Pinterest and Tumblr



-Rich Monday

Got Government

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Got Government.

Filthy Dirty Geography Lesson – Town Signs Worth Money After Stolen!

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Filthy Dirty Geography

Towns With Unique Dirty Names

Fucking, Austria
(Pronounced “fooking.”) The “Fuckingers” considered changing the name in 2004. The majority voted against doing so.


Anus, France
France is a country known for its production of fabulous perfumes.


Dildo, Newfoundland
Each summer, this village celebrates Dildo Days.


Intercourse, Pennsylvania
Intercourse is a quiet little Pennsylvanian Amish town.” The movie Witness was filmed there, and the film “For Richer, or Poorer”


Twatt, Scotland
There are two Twatts in Scotland: One in the Shetland Islands and one in the Orkney Islands. Both Twatts take their name from an Old Norse word meaning “small parcel of land.”


I could have spent days with this project, researching and looking up all the towns and cities history and the stories behind their unique names, but it was insanely difficult to get information on just the few I included here. It was actually a lot of fun and maybe you the reader may want to take on the project of finding out some of the stories and jokes these poor town folks have gone through over the years living in a town with a dirty name.

Thank you to all the travelers who took the time to snap photos of these hilarious town names and then shared them online cost free.


1. Anus, France

2. Assinippi, Massassachusetts

3. Assloss, Scotland

4. Bald Knob, Arkansas

5. Ballplay, Tennessee

6. Beaver Lick, Kentucky

7. Big Beaver, Pennsylvania

8. Big Bone Lick State Park, Kentucky

9. Big Knockerstown, England

10. Blackdykes, England

11. Blowhard, Australia

12. Blue Ball, Ohio

13. Blue Ball, Delaware

14. Blue Ball, Pennsylvania

15. Bobbin Head, Australia

16. Boysack, Scotland

17. Brest, France

18. Bumpass, Virginia

19. Busti, New York

20. Buttzville, New Jersey

21. Cakerbush Scotland

22. Climax, Georgia

23. Cockintake England

24. Cockplay, Scotland

25. Cocksgag, Ohio

26. Deep Gap, Tennessee

27. Dickeyville, Wisconsin

28. Dickshootr, Idaho

29. Dicktown, NewJersey

30. Dildo, Canada

31. Dikshit, India

32. Erect, North Carolina

33. Fanny, West Virginia

34. French Lick, Indiana

35. Fucking, Austria

36. Gayville, South Dakota

37. Hookerville, West Virginia

38. Hornytown, North Carolina

39.Intercourse, Pennsylvania

40. Knock Lick, Kentucky

41. Little Dix Village, West Indies

42. Long Dong, China

43. Loveladies, New Jersey

44. Mary’s Inlet, Canada

45. Mount Gay, West Virginia

46. Mount Mee, Australia

47. Muff, Ireland

48. Nipple, Utah

49. Onacock, Virginia

50. Pennis Wood, England

51. Pussy Creek, Ohio

52. Puseyville, Pennsylvania

53. Ramsbottom, England

54. Sexmoan, Phillippines

55. Shag Island, Indian Ocean

56. Smackass Gap, North Carolina

57. Spread Eagle, Wisconsin

58. Sweet Lips, Tennessee

59. Ta Ta Creek, Canada

60. Three Cocks, Wales

61. Threeway, Virginia

62. Tightsqueeze, Virginia

63. Titisee, Germany

64. Titless, Switzerland

65. Titty Ho, England

66. Twatt, Scotland

67. Virgin Ville, Pennsylvania

68. Wank, Germany

69. Weener, Germany

70. Wetwang, England

-Rich Monday

From The STAMINA Zine Series 2014